Exposing manipulation

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The American Psychological Association defines manipulation as subterfuge designed to influence or control another, usually in a manner which facilitates one’s personal aims.

I’ll elaborate on this definition and say manipulation is the use of different tactics like lying, withholding information, and instigating fear to compel someone to think they should or have to do something the manipulator–the user of the mentioned tactics–desires. The manipulation is successful if the manipulator gets their human target(s) to complete the desired action(s) even when the target(s) doesn’t want to comply. The person being manipulated probably wouldn’t do the task(s) if manipulation wasn’t involved.

Some people believe that manipulation is the most effective and “correct” way to influence others and its a strategy used by many institutions and social structures like families. I think that a majority of humanity has manipulated someone at some point in life but there are some people who relinquish this way of being since it tends to ignore the interests of others. Some of those that give up manipulation tend to rely on creating and presenting win-win scenarios as their primary strategy for getting what they want which is a way of being I prefer and endorse.

There’s also a subset of people who continue manipulating because they think their desires and interests should supersede the desires of the people they manipulate.

One of, if not the most salient root causes for manipulating others is the inability to be ok with not getting what one wants. AKA, not having an outcome-independent posture to life.

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